I have many wonderful memories of Christmas with my family—with my parents and siblings when I was growing up and with my husband and extended family in adulthood.
But I also have wonderful memories of Christmas events with complete strangers—Christmases that reminded me of the true reason for the celebration. Jesus Christ came into the world to save sinners. He came so that we might have life and have it abundantly. He came to show the love of God—the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit. I have been blessed to have had several occasions at Christmas when I could share that love with others.
I wrote about Christmas memories a couple of years ago. One of my favorites is the first year a group of women business owners gave a party for mothers and their children who were in transition from the Battered Women’s Shelter. We had originally offered to give a party or provide gifts for women and children in the Shelter, but staff told us the Shelter received much support from the community at Christmas. However, nothing was being done for a group of women who were in a new transition program. We agreed to give a party and gifts for these twelve women and their children (a total of about twenty children).
The families had stayed at the Shelter for weeks or months until the women found jobs and moved into their own apartments. This was their first Christmas without the husband and father, and although the man had been abusive, being apart from their father during the holidays was difficult and stressful for many of the children. The women were struggling to support and care for their children on their own for the first time. Although the Shelter staff explained all this to us, we didn’t fully comprehend the situation.
We got a list of names and ages of the children and members of the businesswomen’s group bought two or three gifts for each child. We gave the mothers gift certificates to a discount store, and we packaged up some food for each family.
About six of us went to a church in the neighborhood of the Battered Women’s Shelter to host the party. One of our members had played Santa in the past and owned a Santa suit, so she offered to be Santa at the party. As I was leaving the office to go to the party, I had a sudden inspiration. I pulled my Polaroid camera out of my desk and took it with me. I didn’t have any film, so after we assembled at the meeting place and loaded everything into a couple of cars, “Santa” and I made a trip to a nearby drugstore to buy film.
Kids came running from all directions to follow Santa through the store. After we bought enough film to take several pictures of each child, we headed down to the church. The room was already filled with women and children—we learned they had to arrive early because buses didn’t run very often in that area, and if they had waited for the next bus, they would have missed most of the party.
We served refreshments, and although the children and their mothers were shy, they seemed to enjoy the cookies and punch. Then Santa got in position for gift distribution and photo-taking. All the kids hung back—they didn’t seem to want to go up to Santa to get their presents and have their pictures taken. I walked around the perimeter of the room, encouraging the kids to go see Santa. They all nodded politely, but no one said or did anything.
Finally, one of the women, asked in a low voice, “How much does it cost?”
It had never occurred to me that they were afraid they had to pay, but their only experience of pictures with Santa was at the malls, and they could never afford to have their kids’ pictures taken. When I told them it was free, the kids lined up quickly with big grins on their face.
Then one of the mothers asked me, “Would you take a picture of me with my kids? I’ve never had a picture of all of us together.”
I could hardly see through the tears glistening in my eyes and could barely answer through the lump in my throat. “Of course, I’ll be glad to take your picture.” Looking through the camera lens to take the photos, I saw some of the biggest smiles I’ve ever seen in my life. And I can’t begin to describe the joy on each mother’s faces when the Polaroid picture developed and she saw the first photo ever taken of her with her children.
The kids clutched their big bags of gifts and the mothers held tightly to their own bags. No one made a move to open the gifts, so I encouraged the family nearest me to open their gifts.
“Oh, no!” the mother said. “They’re saving their presents so they will have gifts to open on Christmas Day.”
Can you imagine any child you know joyfully saving a gift for a couple of weeks, thrilled they would have a present to open on Christmas morning?
The other ladies and I looked at each other in amazement. We thought we were making Christmas a little brighter for these families. Instead, we were giving them the only Christmas they would have.
I know the party and the gifts meant a lot to those families, but the experience was as meaningful to me as it was to them. We have so many blessings, and we take them so much for granted. Those of us putting on the party were so naive that we never imagined that party and those gifts would be Christmas for the families who attended. We never imagined that a simple Polaroid picture would mean so much to a mother.
The photos weren’t even planned—by the women putting on the party, at least. They were planned by God, and I know the Holy Spirit prompted me to reach for that camera when I had no thought of doing so. I am so grateful for this experience.
The women business owners put on a party for women in transition from the Battered Women’s Shelter for a number of years after that until the group disbanded. By the second year, there were dozens of mothers and nearly a hundred children. After a few years, there were several hundred children. We always took Polaroid pictures of the children and of the family groups, and we always expected to see the mothers and their children lugging their packages to the bus stop after the party.
That first party, though, will always be a very special Christmas memory.
photo credit: wlashbrook
Somehow all my worries and frustrations have disappeared. We are so focused with our daily lives, that we forget that out there there are people with real problems. I do hope that this Christmas we’ll make us all better and more kind!
Mia,
We do need to see the real needs and have compassion for people in dire straits. Most of us are really caring, loving people, but, as you say, we get so focused in our own little worlds that we don’t see what’s going on outside that little frame of reference.
People really awaits this season and they wait for it with enthusiasm. This tradition really gets on people’s heart.
Ron,
Tradition is important, but we really need to focus on the reason for the season.
I remember when one Christmas. Me and my 3 other siblings were asking from our Mom what each of us would prefer that she cooks for that day. Things were at bottom pit for finances then and my Mom didn’t know what to do. So, she bought a little of something for each request – a slice, a cup of ice cream, etc. and explained that its not what we have but its how we try to make the most out of what we have. We all ate happily – happy that we are eating together on Christmas day.
What a precious memory you have, Percy. Your mother turned a difficult situation into a teaching moment and an expression of love.
The true meaning of Christmas can be seen through the good deeds that we are doing to other people. Also we must not forget why we celebrate Christmas.It is not about Santa or the gifts that we give or we receive in this holiday season. It is about Jesus the birth of our savior Jesus Christ.
susci,
Jesus is indeed the reason for the season!
Lillie, this was such a beautiful and moving story. Thank you for sharing it. What a wonderful memory to cherish and I would guess you are very grateful that you had this experience. It’s so important to reach out to help others, especially during Christmas. God bless you.
Thank you, Dawn. Yes, I was very blessed to have this experience, and it is, indeed, a cherished memory.
I think that many people have forgotten that Christmas should be about giving and not recieving. We are so blessed here in the US but many have hit hard times and etc. Do remember to give the gift of love as well as gifts at this time of year. Merry Christmas and God Bless!
Blaine,
And, as I experienced in the situation described in this post, we often receive more than we give when we reach out to help others.
It’s amazing the things we take for granted.
It sure is, Brooke. I grew up “poor,” but never knew it until I went to college and qualified for financial aid because our family was below the poverty level. We never lacked food or clothing, and we always had a wonderful Christmas. I can’t imagine not having gifts for Christmas.
What a wonderful memory that seems to have really been an eye-opener and truly touched you. Sadly, though, too many people give at Christmas time but forget to have compassion the rest of the year. My family’s Christmas is really tight this year, but much of it is because of my own sins of my past finding me out. My kids received clothes from Goodwill and the Salvation Army, but there are many who can’t even afford that. I’ve been involved with my church in helping some truly poor families in the community, so I need to remember to keep things in perspective. I recently posted on my blog about my most memorable Christmas gift, and I invite others to leave a comment and share their’s as well.
Carl,
You’re so right about people giving at Christmas and not the rest of the year. I failed to mention in my post that our organization supported the Battered Women’s Shelter throughout the year. One of the things we did was to provide professional clothes for the women who were looking for work and didn’t have appropriate clothes for the business world.
I’m pleased that our church has several outreach programs. At this time, I am unable to actively participate, so I try to do my part by getting the word out. I’m the webmaster and maintain an email list to keep our parishioners informed. We had several projects at Christmas, but we also have ongoing projects all year long.
I’m sorry that your family is going through tough times right now, but I’m pleased that you are still helping others even when your own resources are limited. God bless you!
I agree that we should not only give to the needy only in the holiday season but all year long. I am a believer that if you do good things good things happen to you.
Charlie,
You may well be right that good things happen to you when you do good things for others. However, whether or not that is the case, as a Christian, I am called to do for “the least of these” regardless of anything that does or does not do for me.
Its really amazing that the act of giving benefits not just the receiver of the gift but the giver as well. The joy in our hearts when we share our blessings is a truly priceless gift for oneself.
Claire,
Yes, there is real joy in giving.
[...] One year a group of us from an organization of businesswomen gave a party for mothers and children w…. There were twelve families in the program, with a combined total of about twenty children. One of our members had played Santa many times, and she agreed to be our Jolly Old St. Nick. [...]